lazz:
a prominent daily observation i’m making is the response people have when shit gets “too real.” real things automatically deter. detour. they actually gross people out, all the sudden they have no words (likely because they’re afraid of hearing and having their own real be heard), or they speak only about vacuous things. they’ll send a text about what time they had a lunch break but not to address that vague comment they made one time about something missing. i can actually remember two moments from the past month wherein the conversation got interesting, they started to draw out some genuine emotion or communication, and both said something along the lines of “whoooaaa this is getting a little too personal for the _________” (insert: dog park, facebook chat, the fucking moon, etc.) but it wasn’t a sly declaration of their disinterest. it was something more like an obligatory mood-lightener.
<what the fuck> does “personal” mean?
i want someone unafraid to say what’s real. i want the freaky shit and things that frighten and the true self before it’s 160 clever characters and Clean Versioned. people to whom “You are ashamed of your flood, while others are ashamed of their ebb” could be written. raw, unabashed, but sometimes bashful cuz i like that. a person willing to be seen in awe. affected.
and too, i want it to be okay when i am seen affected; when i have a flow and when i am also ashamed of it; when i am freaky shit and true self and in tears for every one’s own excommunicated longing.
so, disclaimer i suppose. and potentially an offer. real things do not automatically detour everyone.
counterpoint to the artfulness of the deleted post. thanks lazz.
